"DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL"
This quote was used frequently by one of my models of ministry at the SFOT. A time when we feel emotionally detached from God, but in our heads and deepest recesses of our souls know He is there. I've felt this the past few weeks and what a sad time to experience it...during the celebration of Resurrection Day! I've found myself still in the Word, finding comfort but like the "silent period" no real direction for my walk. Surrounded by people, yet still feeling like I'm in it "alone". Finding that no one is really on the same page for mission, all about self. Could this be reflective of the melancholy attitude I've been feeling...possibly...or is it the reality of those to which we minister? I don't know...these are the answers I seek. When I look at the faces of God's "worshipers" on Sunday...I weep spiritually for these dry bones to wake up! I know in my mind that God sees and is working to melt their hearts to Him...but when??? I guess my question to you is...in ministry and walk with God have you ever had this feeling of "detachment"? How did you work through it? Really seeking some direction here!

PART 6: MINISTRY STUMBLING BLOCKS

Ok, I really don't like to put people under this category...but I've faced one such individual this past week. I am a pretty strict individual (even when it comes to social ministry)--rules, rules, rules. I know that's why God put Philip (my husband) into my life...he's very compassionate and kind in these situations. I've felt convicted to develop the spirit of compassion for people (yes, it seems odd that I would enter into this ministry without it...I know). Anyway, I was coasting along this path when I hit the biggest stumbling block. A man came in for help one evening during programs...I was the only officer there, so I proceeded to offer assistance. To make a long story short, he stole a computer from the office while I was in another room making the arrangements for him! A week and a half later we have finally resolved this situation...following an arrest, a hearing, counseling, probation and restitution! So, here is my question...knowing the addictions and patterns of behavior gripping the people with which we come into contact daily, how can we serve without enabling? How do we instruct and guide without being parental?

WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT

Yesterday when we took the kids home from our Tuesday night programs, I walked the kids to their doors to meet and invite their parents to the Easter concert. One family sticks out in my mind and I want to share this with you. I walked 4 children (ages 3, 6, 8, and 11) home and they walked in yelling for their mother to come to the door. Instead, I was "greeted" by a half dressed man that looked like he'd spent too much time on cloud 9. Anyway, as I entered their home, I had to step over piles of clothing, diapers, empty boxes, and toys. In the 2 rooms I had seen, there was a distinct walking path created by the garbage and clutter. These 4 children are the most difficult as far as behavior at our activities, but these were the things that made me see the importance of their "escape" on Tuesday nights. Their mother standing barely dressed in the kitchen was holding a 10 month old baby and looked like she hadn't slept in years. As I handed her the invitation and told her who I was, I could barely keep her attention for 5 seconds (the baby wasn't crying, fussing, or anything). I said goodbye to the kids and went out the door. The kids came to the door and yelled out "Bye Captain, Good night!".
I've been searching for a real ministry that the Lord confirmed last night. We can do all the programming we want, we can be creative in planning parties and services, but what is it all about? It's the practical, life stuff that matters. How can we "do the most good" behind our desks or out of a program guide? How can we fool ourselves into believing that one more program or one more contest is the key? People need real servants coming without hidden agendas or plans (stats, awards, certificates, or plaques). Let's get real!